Monday, April 23, 2007

Moral Realignment Challnge: Starfire and Psimon

In the Moral Realignment Challenge, I imagine how a bad guy would look as a good guy, and vice-versa. Currently I'm working my way through the Fearsome Five and the Teen Titans! Hey, Starfire and Psimon! You're up to bat!


From "Quiz the Question Guy (All-Psimon Edition)" in "Direct Currents" on the back pages of "Brainiac Bunch" #218 (February 1982) on Earth-AAA:

Q: Where did Psimon get his powers? A: Orphan Simon Jones was granted his magic mental abilities by the old wizard Trigon the Terrific!

Q: Why does Psimon wear that dome on his head and what is it made of (the dome, not his head)? A: Now that he's a grown man, only Psimon's special diamond quartz helmet can keep his awesome powers in check when he's outside of his containment capsule.

Q: What happened to the Psimon back-up in CLAIRVOYANT COMICS? A: Psimon is busy adventuring with his pals in THE NEW FEARLESS FIVE. But don't be surprised if he guest-stars later this year in CLAIRVOYANT fighting alongside his former mentor, Doctor Psychic!

Q: Why does Starfire have it in for Psimon? A: In DC SUPERSTARS IN SPACE #6 he prevented her from destroying her home planet of Tamaran.

Q: Is Psimon related to Validus from the LEGION OF THE SUPER-VALIANT comic? They both have mental powers, Psimon wears purple and has a see-through helmet and Validus is purple-skinned and has a see-through head! A: Wow! Interesting theory, but nope! Validus is not Psimon's descendant. Besides, can you imagine your child coming out looking like your favorite outfit? That would just be silly!


Evil Psimon is a creepy monster so I made Good Psimon a handsome hunk. He has that Mister Freeze thing goin' on with the helmet so the fact he's a dreamboat just makes it all the more tragic he can't kiss anybody. (And conceptually, Good Psimon owes a lot to Cyclops, Rogue, Jack of Hearts, and just for the heck of it, Captain Marvel... er, the Fawcett/DC one.) I based Good Psimon's costume on the Evil Psimon's original duds... y'know, the hot pink choir robe with the lace collar? That's where the cape came from. So the terrarium helmet wouldn't get lonesome, I added see-through-plastic-over-white gloves and kneepads. The rest of the costume is done up in shades of purple to coordinate with the cape. Finally, his hair is white, because it goes with the whole colorless/see-through head theme. Besides, I just can't resist a good-lookin' guy with prematurely white hair!


Good Starfire's costume is a flimsy purple number with freakin' daisies or some shit on it, so I made Evil Starfire's costume the opposite of that in several ways:
  1. It covers everything except her face and hands.
  2. The color is hot instead of cool.
  3. The shapes are geometric instead of organic. Specifically, that goofball flower thing has been replaced by hexagons.
Also, her positively gargantuan Tamarafro of sproingy, curly hair -- or rather, the energy that surrounds it and creates the illusion of a trail as she passes by, is confined to a crest of flames atop the helmet. Voila! Curvy cosmic badass!

Next week: I'm not done with Starfire yet! It's Gender Reassignment Challenge time!

Previous Moral Realignment Challenges:


Anonymous said...

... Trigon the Terrific. Very, very nice.

Would that make Raven Psimon's Black Adam? Psi-Bird? Uh, Psimantha? Maybe not.

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

I'm not so hot on Fishbulb there, but Starfire is hotter 'n a two dollar pistol. Too bad she's evil now...

Anyway, good job once again and I like the reworking of Psimon's origin.

Anonymous said...

It covers everything except her face and hands.

A secret that has worked in pro-wrestling for years. Want to get the fans to boo the hot chick? Cover her up and have her refuse to show any skin. Instant heel heat.

Michael said...

What happens if Psimple Psimon has an itch on his nose? Is the helmet gas permeable such that he can breathe and not choke on his carbon dioxide exhalation? Can he nod his head without bumping his nose? What if he has to sneeze, or wants to get a drink?

Word verification: rpodbt, which is a cheap knockoff of an ipodbt.

LurkerWithout said...

Isn't there already a guy in the DC 'verse named Starfire? Some Russian?

*checks Starman trades*

Right, Leonid Kovar...

Jeremy Rizza said...

Johnathan: Food for thought! I like it!

Jon: It just so happens that "Fishbulb" is what Good Mammoth likes to call Good Psimon. They have a Thing/Mister Fantastic type of relationship...

David: I don't know if you're kidding but either way it's genius! I'm trying to picture Chyna in a sensible pants suit.

Michael: To answer your questions, in order: telekenisis, yes (because the helmet is magic just like his powers), no (and it makes a disarming *klonk* sound), matter teleportation, and he should have thought about that before we left and if he asks me one more time I'm going to turn this damn car around and go back home.

Lurkerwithout: Yup, and there's also a sexy warrior woman with either a green giraffe-print leotard or the worst fungal infection I've ever seen. I did a post on her once! There's also an amusing issue of Robinson's Starman with Rashoman-type variations on the same story, and in each one the "space pirate" bad guy has one of the three Starfires chained up near his throne, Princess Leia-style. Yes, including Leonid.

Anonymous said...

I've been away too long. Much awesome!

LurkerWithout said...

Man, that Starman issue is full of characters who need one of your makeovers. Any of the Starfires. Ultra the Multi-Alien. The Star Rovers. Space Cabbie...

Jeremy Rizza said...

Chawunky: Thanks, pal!

Lurkerwithout: You're right, and some of those guys would be real challenges. For Ultra, I'd have to start with a whole head transplant.

Yankee Jones said...

Doesn't Starfire already have an evil counterpart?

Y'know: Blackfire?

Jeremy Rizza said...

Yankee: Oh, wiseguy, eh? The difference is, my "evil Starfire" doesn't look like a tacky middle-aged Romulan.

Erich said...

I'm really enjoying these "moral realignment" makeovers. When you've finished the Titans/Fearsome Five series, would you consider having a go at the original Doom Patrol and Brotherhood of Evil?

Jeremy Rizza said...

Well... okay!