What's Wrong With This Picture?

I understand the concept of "artistic license" as it applies to super-characters. Like how Michael Golden would draw the collar of Doctor Strange's cloak with big curlicues, or how when Al Milgrom drew "The New Mutants" every female character had hair down to her waist, or how Juan Bobillo can be counted on to redesign the costume of pretty much every super-hero who guest-stars in the current "She-Hulk" book (and I kind of love him for that). But as a time-traveler, I also understand the concept of "anachronism." And Chris Weston's depictions of the Golden Age Sandman's and Stripesy's costumes in "Star Spangled Comics" #1 (May, 1999) caused my suspension of disbelief to snap like a cheap rubberband and hit me in the face. Hard.



I'm referring to the cut of their underpants -- worn over their costumes, natch, in true Golden Age hero fashion. The problem? They're speedos. Banana hammocks. Plum smugglers. Lunch sacks. They're very "potbellied Frenchman on holiday at Coney Island" but they're not very appropriate to the era. Not for super-hero costumes, anyway. I suppose the provocatively-cut undergarments do help to showcase the Sandman's and Stripesy's gargantuan junk. At least Weston got something right! He draws the Star-Spangled Kid and Sandy the Golden Boy the same way. I'd show those panels but it might not be considered "work safe." So just trust me on that one. In a nutshell (haw!) the story is titled "A Terrifying Hour!" but I would have called it "Prominent Packages On Parade." Catchy, no?