Thursday, August 17, 2006

Dead Wood

realcowboylee



The American West: a rugged, unforgiving environment fit only for gaunt, sophisticated, slim-ankled fifty-something bachelors. Or at least, that's the order of things according to this Lee Riders jeans ad from"Adventure Comics" #390 (March-April 1970). I agree; nothing says "roughing it" quite like sitting in a faux wood-paneled basement, reading aloud from "Us Magazine" and making catty remarks about Lindsay Lohan.

Man. It's like they want to role-play but they just can't muster the enthusiasm for it. "You look like a real cowboy, Lee." "And you look like Noel Coward, 'Uncle Frank.' No, 'Uncle Frank,' I really don't feel like wrestling with you right now. Maybe after I finish this crossword puzzle. And probably not even then. But I still get to keep the five hundred bucks... right, 'Uncle Frank?'"

And now, a worrisome juxtaposition of images from the end of the advertisement:

brandjeans

It's like an instruction manual for illiterate serial killers.

9 comments:

Chawunky said...

Heh heh heh heh heh...

Chawunky said...

Before I forget--BB, have you been watching Who Wants to be a Superhero? If so, do you plan to comment on the "fashion makeover" segment a few weeks back? There weren't oodles of stuff to work with, but as I watched it I wondered what your take would be.

Excelsior! And all that...

jayunderscorezero said...

Okay, my inner pedant is running wild. That 'Lee' brand should be written backwards, so that it comes up the right way when pressed into...well, whatever it's supposed to be pressed into, I guess.

Bully said...

No wonder my tiny dunagees say "eeL"!

Steven said...

Gee, Bully, I'd think you of all bloggers would have a more... visceral reaction to a cattle brand.

And BB, real cowboys need to know what's in this season too, y'know. Don't want to be riding hard in yesterday's spurs, if you know what I mean.

Phillip said...

I guess it's not really your purview, but didja check out that freaky "Supergirl's Cowboy Hero" story in that issue? She falls for Super-Horse! Eeeww!!
I second the call for a little WWTBAS-H coverage. Scipio convinced me to watch, and now I'm hooked.

Blockade Boy said...

I have a very low tolerance for King Bullshitter Stan Lee and the consistently crooked "hairline" of his toupee (every time I see that guy, the toupee is slightly askew and at this point I just have to assume he's doing it on purpose), so I haven't watched much of WWTBAS-H. Sure seems to be popular 'round Blog Country, though!

Scipio said...

I'm stuck trying to figure out whether Lee is wearing a neckerchief or an orchid corsage, and which would be gayer.

"The Lee Riders"? Is that what Lee calls his 'uncles'? Can I join the Lee Riders Club for only $500?

P.S. I join the chorus of those calling for your reviews or revision of the costumed candidates on WWTBASH. Except, of course, for Major Victory, whose costume is perfect.

Blockade Boy said...

God, an orchid corsage would have been fantastic. It's Aging Gay Bachelor Prom season!

As for WWTBASH? Now that you've asked me, I pretty much have to do it! Now I just have to get caught up on all the episodes... which shouldn't be a problem considering it's on the Sci Fi Channel. They probably run it five times a day.