Friday, April 25, 2008

Two Funerals and a Wedding


From "Secret Romances" #27 (Superior Publishers, July 1955) comes this charming tale of Andy the brain-parasite. Andy's soft, boneless form luckily resembles a limp little army hat. Nobody will be the wiser when he feasts upon the gray matter of a shady soldier boy, and then rides the corpse like a pony at the state fair! Nobody, that is, except the soldier's sister, who happily consents to become Andy's wife! All the couple has to do is change their identities and move to some backwater town where nobody knows them. Perhaps they will take up alligator farming on the bayou. Andy will be known (and beloved) by the locals as "Old Shep", the sweet (if somewhat bloated, greenish, and foul-smelling) eccentric who utterly refuses to remove his old army hat, no matter the circumstances! Anne, meanwhile, will dutifully give birth to a litter of hybrid children, who totter about on rubber-boned stumps, and who generally resemble half-filled colostomy bags.*

*Disclaimer: I might be making all of this up.


Comixbear said...

Hey, you may be making all of that up, but I'm betting it's way more interesting than the ORIGINAL story!!!

And don't forget the dating tip in the story...propose to your girlfriend over the corpse of her just-murdered brother. It get's them in the mood every time!

Gus Casals said...

I'd rather believe I'm reading about brain parasites than thinking this is a misoginistic, propaganda drivel of dubious morality.

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Man I wish I'd have thought of proposing to my wife while standing over the corpse of her brother.

Nepharia said...

No. That would not put me in the mood. However, I must say that comixbear's site sure did. :-O

Jeremy Rizza said...

Comixbear: That "dating tip" is standard operating procedure on Rimbor!

Gustavo: This whole comic book is abominable. It's surreal, reading a "romance" comic that was assembled by woman-haters.

Jon: Well, if you two ever want to renew your vows, you'll know what to do.

Nepharia: Yeah! Three cheers for Comixbear's blog! I'm glad he's commenting here, so maybe it will help increase the commenting on his own blog. It really deserves more adulation.

Comixbear said...

Aw, blush! I feel all warm and fuzzy. Of course, I'm a bear, so I always feel that way! ;)

captain koma said...

Have you had enough with the costume judging?

Cause I can get someone else to do it.

Jeremy Rizza said...

I love judging costumes, but it seems like I just don't have time, lately. I hate to say it, but I'd better hand in my sash. It's not fair of me to keep you guys waiting like this.

And thanks again for asking me to do it in the first place. It was fun!