Thursday, November 02, 2006

Legion Of Substitute Costumes: Polecat

bbhead100906 Polecat is the whole reason I started redesigning the costumes of rejected Legion applicants. I've made no secret of the fact that I don't like the smelly little bugger, but I did accidentally crush him and I'm sorry for that. And I've often wondered, why don't I like him? Is he really that bad? Is it just my problem? Y'see, one of my many enchanting foibles is a tendency to overreact to things I find aesthetically displeasing, especially if they are obnoxious or tacky -- and Polecat is basically a walking fart joke! Upon deeper consideration, I've found a lot to admire about Polecat. He's very proud of his culture, which is important, and he's not afraid to be himself. It's just a damn shame he's hideously unattractive, has no taste in clothes, and has a laugh like a car alarm. So if I ever manage to get back to my specific timeline (not that I'm in a rush, mind you) I'll present him with the greatest gift I could ever give: a makeover! And maybe a gift certificate to an orthodontist.

So, here's the "before":


polecatold


Law & Odor: Fashion Victims Unit! The biggest "don't" in his outfit is the pairing of bare thighs and long sleeves. He looks like a gymnast. A girl gymnast. On top of that, the design is boring with a capital bore. Black with a single racing stripe. He looks like a Camaro, only nobody wants to take him for a ride if you know what I mean. And that greasy bowl cut isn't doing him any favors.

And here's my "after":

polecatnew


I designed a symbol for him (stylized skunk in the shape of a "p") and, more importanly, gave him some freakin' pants. I shaved his head to show off his horns. And to show off his entire head (I know, risky) I gave him a huge fur collar and matching trim on the gloves and boots. I think it looks pretty tough, albeit in a Bob Fosse sort of way.

Rock on, stinky!

9 comments:

Chawunky said...

It looks like you insisted on some major facial reconstruction for Polecat, to show off the ensemble to best effect!

Nice one.

Darth Nepharia said...

BB, this is just SUCH an improvement. He started out looking like Alfred E. Neuman (for the uninitiated, go here) and he ended up looking more like Sabretooth. Not a bad transformation....

Justin Garrett Blum said...

He looks sort of like an Eastern European pop star or something. Groovy. I love the symbol you've designed for him.

Anonymous said...

Hmmmm...
That tat he's got makes me think I may have seen Polecat working as a go-go boy at a Rimborian strip club. That place did stink!

And darn you BB, stop controlling my mind! I thought I had come up with the idea to do a TPCM Legion fashion focus today; apparently I'm simply your puppet!!

Anonymous said...

Wow! You made a guy whose power is to smell bad actually LOOK COOL! I think you may have pulled off a miracle, or made the 8th wonder of the world, here, Blockade Boy. Outstanding!

Phillip said...

Good job, BB! Now don't cheat and reuse this if you do a sex-change challenge on Marvel's Black Cat...

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Very nice makeover.

Hey if Polecat got in a fight with The Spleen who'd win?

Barriss Offee said...

Nice now we know what Sabretooth looks like as a skunk.

Blockade Boy said...

Glad all (or most of you) like it!

Chawunky: As you can see, I'd also insist on skin bleaching so his flesh doesn't clash with the fabrics.

Queer Legion: He's supposed to be wearing a t-shirt with the logo on it instead of it being a tattoo, but I like your idea better.

Jon: Polecat vs. the Spleen? I don't know who would win, but I do know that everybody else would be the losers in that fight.