Monday, December 11, 2006

Nice Day For A White (Supremacist) Wedding

blockadesantahead In "The Invaders" #20 (September 1977) we get to see the attempted wedding of Master Man and Warrior Woman.


The groom is in his Captain Nazi rip-off costume, while the bride is wearing... GA-GA-GOING!!! Check out the shoulders on that lady! You know, if it wasn't for the breasts and the general hairlessness and the lack of a penis and the whole Nazi thing, I'd be all over that. (Admittedly, my standards aren't that high.)

This may seem strange to the young'uns in the audience, but a superpowered woman in a straight-up dominatrix costume was actually quite startling in 1977. No, for reals. Of course she's a baddie so she can't be too sexy. She's saddled by that Mrs. Olsen hair and those non-feminine shoulders. But still. The costume itself? Titilating, I suppose. I don't like the random belt on the thigh, although I respect the fact that she didn't dick around with some narrow strappy thing. Naw, that's regulation redneck-width! All it needs is a belt buckle shaped like a cow skull. On the plus side is her fortified bustier. The single shoulder strap may not be aesthetically pleasing but at least it's more practical than that goofy boobs-a-poppin' number Wonder Woman likes to wear. (It also wouldn't surprise me to learn that Warrior Woman wears a cup.)

Oh, and Master Man can't figure out that the lady with the severe hairstyle and the linebacker shoulders isn't into him? Nazis: not the sharpest knives in the drawer.

Well, let's see how things are going at the reception.


Yikes. Er, let's skip ahead to the next issue and see what's happening with Dyna-Mite (you heard me).


Yeah, Dyna-Mite never takes care of what's going on "down below." Don't get me wrong; he's eager enough, he's just not terribly thorough. Although I appreciate that he's wearing one of my designs. The l'il cutie.


Anonymous said...

That image of the Nazi chaplain still saluting after being crushed to a blood pulp by falling rubble may be the funniest thing I've seen all week. Then again, it is only Monday.

Scipio said...

PUBLIC CALL for Roger and Toro slash/fic!!!

Because Toro in nothing but leather panties and boots ... HOT!!!

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

So why doesn't Warrior Woman like Master Man anyway? They'd make such superior children, I'm sure.

Anonymous said...

Wow. I actually have . . . er, had, pre-mildew-beast . . . that issue. At the time (I was 9), I had no idea who any of these people were (other than Hitler, of course). I never did get to find out why the drugs hit Toro harder than anyone else, either.

Jon: Pssst. She's probably, ahm, not into men. She ... wears comfortable shoes. Well, probably not judging by the rest of her outfit.


Sie ist eine Dyche!

Anonymous said...

Of course, she can't come out and admit that, this being Nazi Germany. So there she is, marrying Master Ba... Man at Alfie's behest.

Nepharia said...

Nah, Warrior Woman is NOT going to wear comfortable shoes, regardless of her sexual orientation -- she's a Dom all the way: I expect 5" heels.

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

"My Warrior Woman, what big heels you have!"

"All the better to stomp your crotch with, my dear."

Anonymous said...

I was gonna say the same about Dyna-Mite's suit... hey, that looks designed by Blockade Boy!

Thanks for linking my blog BB!

Jeremy Rizza said...

Scipio: Maybe we can get Geoff Johns. He has experience with that sort of thing, based on the Hank/Jan sex scene from his "Avengers" run.

Jon: Your naivete is touching.

Magnus: You're quite welcome. And I'm honored to have a reader with such illustrious credentials!