Monday, December 31, 2007

Don't Lose That Humber

dc480apollomissile



Sorry, but my outrage is rather disjointed today.
  • Welcome to Gotham City, where the moon is not only full every night of the year, but also careens about the sky like a freaking pinball, in order to keep Batman's big, chunky head in silhouette. Sure, the constant earthquakes and tidal waves are a bitch, but at least the city's number one hero can look way cool!
  • I can't believe "Humber" is an actual brand. And yet it is. I'm still pissed off about it, though.
  • "Blasting away like an Apollo Missile"? Huh. Do they even make those anymore? The name itself takes me back to my time traveling days, when the Cold War gave every romance an undercurrent of existential doom. Kind of like a Hemingway novel, but with synthetic fibers. Wow. I have nostalgia for a nuclear warhead!
  • That poor, desperate dope in the foreground? No, it's not the baddie who got punched through a window. It's just the last dude who tried to make sense out of Don Newton's page layouts. All y'all, do yourself a favor: give up on that shit now. Before it destroys you.

3 comments:

Stephen R. said...

Humber is an actual brand? Really?

Well, I guess if a diet pill named "AYDS" can hit the market at the exact same time that AIDS hit the gay community - - complete with commercials featuring beaming women repeating the slogan, "Lose weight the AYDS way!" - - any bizarro name is possible.

Happy New Year! Hope you're having a great time.

Bill S. said...

I actually went to the trouble of going to Wikipedia to find that, yes, Humber is a kind of car. Such is my exciting, exciting life.

Jeremy Rizza said...

Stephen: Yup! I looked it up!

Bill S.: Yeah, can you believe it? I was actually hoping it was a made-up name (like the "Hoston" line of fashions in that Mannikin story I covered a while back) so I could make fun of it. No such luck. Damn it.