Dracula: Prince Of Dorkness

...And my hair is perfect. Nope, this isn't a mask. Unfortunately. AAAARRROOOOOO! *clears throat* Sorry, I'm prone to doing that now. Anyway, take my advice: don't stand in front of the microwave at QuikTrip while you're wearing Zuunium cuff links. I'm afraid I caused quite the ruckus -- a half-dozen fashion victims mauled, and not a stick of beef jerkey left in the place. Grrrrroowwwlll AAARROOOOO! *ahem* But fear not! Such a low dosage of irradiated Zuunium should wear off by tomorrow. For now, though, I have yellow eyes, horrifying teeth, and there's so much fur on my face you can barely make out my facial features. Thank God this is Wichita, Kansas, or else I might stand out. (Halloween, hell! I could walk the streets of this redneck burg on freaking Arbor Day and not draw a crowd.) But enough about my personal problems. You came here for the costumes! Well, I'm in a Monster Mash kind of mood today, so I decided to redesign Dracula's superhero costume.

You heard me.

This is Dell Comics' Dracula. He's not a vampire, but he has ultrasonic hearing (I'm not sure how that's helpful, unless criminals communicate with one another through a series of high-pitched chirps and whistles) and he can turn into a bat and control bats. And yet he looks like a total goober. So here's how I would have dressed him:

I changed the motif from "bat" to "dragon" based on Vlad Dracul's membership in the Order of the Dragon. And since it looks a bit like a rib cage, I added designs that look a bit like bones to the arms and legs. And I replaced the dopey bat-belt with a sash to break up all the red and to add a little historical flavor. No cape, you ask? Damn skippy! My goal was to really emphasize the superhero aspect. My first sketches wound up looking too much like historical costume, with old-timey capes and leather armor and pirate boots and such. Those designs looked fantastic, naturally, but they didn't scream "superhero." That's why I based the final design around a monotone body suit, and just embellished it with the sash and the dragon/bone detailing. For just a pinch more drama, I gave him corpse-like makeup, a beard and long hair. The hair provides the motion that a cape would have, and it contrasts with the angular silhouette of the suit. And yes, I suppose he looks like the old Marvel villain, the Tarantula, but I didn't notice that until I was inking it. Swear to God.

So forget ol' bat-ears up there. This is a guy I'd let sink his teeth into me. Or vice-versa! AAAAAARRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! *ahem* Sorry.