Wednesday, November 21, 2007

My Other Tank Top is a Porsche

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To quote Crow from MST3K, "He's an idiot savant. Minus the savant."

Jeebus, but these 1978 fashions depress the heck out of me. From the racing-stripe tank top worn by the balding douche in the back ground, to the Dennis the Menace/Incredible Hulk/Pirates of the Caribbean tribute ensemble sported by the balding douche in the foreground, it's all one big, ugly blur to me. A big, ugly, purplish blur. It makes my retinas throb. No wonder everybody in your country became addicted to cocaine!

...Er, that is what happened, right? Aside from my time travels, most of my knowledge of your era comes from one of my planet's grade school text books, "Amadus Is Way Better Than 20th Century Earth." (Apparently, my home planet is way better than a lot of places! How fortunate I am to have lived there!)

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

1970s Earth was like one giant episode of What Not to Wear.

Stephen R. said...

Well, I don't know about EVERYBODY, but I DEFINITELY was riding the white horse in the 70's. And I was born in 1970, so there.

Jeremy Rizza said...

Justin: Well, now I want to steal another time bubble and give the entire decade a makeover.

Stephen: I think I saw an After School Special based on your childhood! (On pay-per-view.)

Anonymous said...

The guy in the magenta stripes looks like he was drawn by Alan Davis in this panel--he's even attempting Davis-style graceful hand gestures.

Jeremy Rizza said...

I think "Tub" looks a lot like a Davis character too, when he's all gussied up as the Perfect Fighting Machine. It's uncanny.

Anonymous said...

Funny thing, since the 1970s, grade school textbooks here all have the subtitle, Anywhere Is Way Better than Twentieth Century America. I can only assume that Amadus must have sent the craft that crashed in Roswell, and that's all we salvaged. That, and a copy of "Fashion Don'ts" magazine that's gotten the fashion industry through the nineties.

Look, he's playing with his calculator again!

Like...a pet? Or a doll? Or that boring "game" where you add up a bunch of nonsense numbers and the answer is "Shell Oil" upside-down?

He's probably just adding up the colors in the black guy's outfit, now that I think about it, but I'd still like to know for sure.

Jeremy Rizza said...

Hey--! How'd you know about the Roswell crash? I'm sorry, but you'll have to be mind-wiped. You may expect a visit from two insanely hairy men in black suits, oh, any second now.