Legion Of Substitute Costumes: Spider Girl

Here's a new addition to my burgeoning list of design challenges: recostuming anyone who was ever rejected by the Legion of Super Heroes. The idea grew from a single cartoon of Polecat that I drew while waiting with Jeremy in the DMV (he promised it would only take a minute and then when we arrived there was like, three hundred people ahead of us). So to pass the time I started sketching. Then next thing I knew, I'd devised costumes for the original roster of the Legion of Substitute Heroes and a bunch of others, besides! And here's the first one I'd like to show you. It's very nearly Halloween in your backwards, superstitious era (praise be to the Luck Lords) so in honor of that I present: Spider Girl! (Creepy!) Let's take a gander at the "before," shall we? Here's Spider Girl getting all her hopes and dreams crushed by a lame pun:



I'd feel sorry for her, but c'mon! Trying out for the Legion of Super Heroes without having even a modicum of control over your powers is like auditioning for American Idol without any singing ability. You're just asking for a snooty foreigner with huge jugs to tear you a new one. Still, Spider Girl didn't exactly put her best foot forward, now did she? First there's that nasty, dry, fly-away hair (SUNSILK!!! Sorry, I don't know what came over me) and then there's the costume. She's not exactly "dressing for success." The ultra-realistic spider web design is neither attractive nor intriguing -- it's merely gross. And the copious-yet-haphazard rusching makes her look like the world's sultriest trilobite. No sir, I don't like it. Here's how I would have attired her:



You go-go-go, Spider Girl! Except for some modishly-slicked bangs in the front, most of her hair is pulled back from her face. I also would have introduced the lady to a handy little invention called "conditioner." Now, that's the kind of hair you want to throttle you into unconsciousness. I added a mask because it's fun and mysterious, and it goes with the Halloween party feeling of the costume, and also because it's about the only thing that makes the outfit a costume and not just a dress. *nervous laughter* And what a dress! It's a charming little number in a violet-gray fabric that is slightly sheer, and worn over a darker body stocking. That way she can enjoy wearing something with a high hemline and not come off like looking like a pole dancer, Supergirl. Er, *ahem* and the entire ensemble is finished off with black silk slippers (with treads on 'em, for action!) and some fun bangles. There ya go, honey. Don't forget what I said about the conditioner.