Monday, October 01, 2007

All Fall Down


People sure faint a lot in "The Invincible Iron Man." What is this, a Henry James novel? Should they all be clutching lace hankies as they crumple to the ground? Were they really exhausted or just overcome by a fit of "the vapors?" Will Nick Fury show up in a stovepipe hat and a waistcoat, carrying a bottle of smelling salts? No, for realsies. Well, at least a story with three different characters fainting in it (one of them twice!) is so ridiculous that Young Gerry Conway would never have the temerity to resort to anything even approaching it, ever, ever again.

Oh, wait...



And it gets worse. A jagged edge explosion balloon, in pink, no less, explaining how Iron Man feels or maybe telling him how to feel? (More "ESP"! Is Marvel Girl just around the corner? Or in the dumpster?) And a "next issue" blurb that's a non-committal as Iron Man himself? I'm surprised anybody bought the next issue. Thank God for subscriptions, huh, Marvel?

Sweet Jeebus, this thing is a mess. Like I've said before, Old Gerry Conway is a fine television scriptwriter, but his early comics stuff just gives me a bellyache. But I think my feelings about "The Invincible Iron Man" #41 can best be said in a bit of dialog by Old Jerry Siegel:



Phillip said...

Awesome! For your next feature, I propose you blog through a little comic called Iron Man #41. There's sure to be months of material there...

Seriously, I'm starting to miss it already.

Stephen R. said...

"When Demons Wail" I didn't know my ex-bf was featured in INVINCIBLE IRON MAN!!!

Anonymous said...

The use of second-person narrative in this comic makes it seem like a Choose Your Own Adventure book.

If you wish to shoot your repulsor ray, go to page 13

If you wish to act all emo and whiny, go to page 24

If you wish to reclaim the time wasted reading this piece of crap, throw this book on a fire and run away.

Jeremy Rizza said...

Phillip: Thanks! I enjoyed working on it, but I have to admit it didn't really adhere to the theme of my blog. I'm going to try to stick to fashion posts for a while, plus there'll be tons of posts on my exciting new job which I already have but haven't blogged about yet, you'll meet the four new (and I do mean "new") people in my life, and also I've caught the Drama Bug so I can guarantee you some Big Monkey-style Dramatic Readings, only fashion-themed. In other words, fun, fun, fun!

Stephen: I hope he at least was a better dresser than Slasher and Demitrius.

David: You're right! Although at times it's more like "I'm Choosing Your Adventure FOR You and You're Going to Like It."

Phillip said...

"I've caught the Drama Bug"

I can just hear David Sedaris saying "Thank you, my lord!"

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

OK, who's whinier Gerry Conway's Iron Man or heroes' Peter Petrelli?

Anonymous said...


Oh, my head is swimming with all the nasty, sarcastic things that can be said about these last panels. It's--it's overwhelming, as if they all want to be said at once!

So, Iron Man's feet can't carry him fast enough to the girl that's right behind them. I guess that's what happens when you leave the rollerskates popped out. And what the heck is so paradoxical about being helpless when you couldn't get there in the first place!?

You want to hold her...but something stops you.

Uhm...thanks, Mr. Explosive Voiceover Exposition Guy, but...well, no. See, Iron Man is holding her. Unless you're talking about Lucie. Then that washboard thing she was wearing over the jumpsuit might stop him from holding her.

Will this romance end in disaster--as all the others have?

Gah. Nothing is more irritating than a drunk with a girlfriend. Dude, your romance started in disaster. Remember? Does the destruction of the airport (seeing as how you failed to save it and all) ring a bell at all? Or was he just too drunk out of his mind to focus on anything but that girl's short skirt and Whitepants's proverbial hand?

And, no, Young Gerry Conway, what of Marrrriannnnne's Strange ESP PowersTM? Seriously, man, what the #*%$ is up with that? Maybe you'll tell us!? Yeah, right. And maybe the next issue will have, like, a hero who saves lives and makes things better rather than whimpering and collapsing.

Heh. BB, this has been way too much fun. Thanks for the "book club" atmosphere and some great insights on this monster of a comic. Theme be damned (or at least given some time off to confess sins and whatnot), when it's for this good a cause.

Though I'm also looking forward to see what new fashion and art (and drama!) are on the way.

Anonymous said...

Oops. Forgot to mention that Mr. Explosive Voiceover Exposition Guy has to have a French accent.

Yew want tew huld hurr...but somesing stop yew.

Siskoid said...

Wow, awful to the last drop!

Thoroughly enjoyed the whole series. Baldfacedly copying it in my own way on the SBG. Sheepishly requesting more when you've recovered.

Jeremy Rizza said...

Philip: Well, I promise not to talk like Young Gerry Conway in everyday conversation, anyhow. (I had to Google that reference in order to come up with a suitable reply. Thank you, Google!)

Jon: That's one of the many reasons why I don't watch "Heroes."

Anonymous: Thanks! It's reading stuff like this that makes it all worthwhile. And I love the French accented explosion balloon!

Siskoid: Glad you liked it! If and when I do something like this again, I'll try to find something more overtly costume-themed. Like a Patsy Walker comic or that old Supergirl story where she tries on all kinds of godawful outfits with the help of Emma Peel-style Wonder Woman.