Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Compressed Dare

s183thinkyouresmart

Lana--! Don't tell him how you're going to-- and you're admitting that you're going to your own house?! (What, you can't think of anyplace else in Smallville that might have a freakin' microscope, of all things?!

(I guess you were right... you are as smart as Superboy!)

Actually, Professor Lang's house just might be the only structure in town with a microscope. Shortly after the broadcast of a documentary about those little creatures that live in people's eyelashes, Smallville's current town council and school board have both outlawed the devices, claiming they are "abominations" and "the devil's work." Why, just the other day they held a big rally and burned Anton van Leeuwenhoek in effigy. In really tiny effigy.

7 comments:

Nate said...

Is it just me or is this just a tad passive-agressive? Young Superman (tm) has got some issues to work out.

Bill S. said...

And, um, how does Superboy compress a wrecking ball that was about as tall as he was to the size of a pea? Are wrecking balls hollow? Wouldn't that sort of defeat the whole idea? Or is Supes somehow generating Pym particles? Or whatever the DC equivalent is -- Palmer particles?

Dave said...

Ad bill s.)

One of Super{boy|man}'s powers back in the day was Super-Leverage-We-Don't-Need-No-Steenkin-Leverage. It's the same principle that lets him move a terrestrial planet out of its orbit without turning it into a cloud of asteroids.

This was probably why DarkAge!Clone!Superboy had that "tactile telekinesis" power...

Jeremy Rizza said...

Gyuss Baaltar: "Young Superman (tm)!" Haw! Or based on how he acts in this story, "Old Superbaby (tm)."

Bill S.: The answer is-- hey, look over there! *runs away*

Dave: That's probably it. And I hate that I know this, but the "tactile telekinesis" power they gave Connor Kent had its roots in the John Byrne-written "Millenium" tie-in (I know, it just keeps getting better) issue of "Adventures of Superman" where Superman is rendered immobile inside a Manhunter spacecraft and still manages to move it... with his mind! He just figures out he has that power based on the fact he can pick up an ocean liner without the weight of the thing causing him to burst through it. I presume he forgot he has it again.

Skeleton Munroe said...

Wait... hold on...

I'll accept that you can squash that solid metal ball to the size of a pea, Superboy. But how the hell are you going to keep your name intact while you do it? By any stretch of the imagination you are seriously deforming that sucker, and probably melting it as well. Either you or Lana or both are *way* too easy to believe in the omnipotence of your powers.

Jeremy Rizza said...

Jonathan: It's probably best not to think too much about the Gravity Girl story. That way lies madness. Honestly, its worse than any Lovecraftian tome. I'm probably lucky to have finished it without being devolved to a protoplasmic state.

MaGnUs said...

BB: Yeah, the tactile tk has is roots in the Byrne/era Superman... not just in that history, but in all of it... from the very start of the post-COIE Superman, he'd comment that objects seemed less heavy when he flew carrying them, as if somehow he made them fly with him. I think it's a pretty valid theory....