CSI: Hot Air Balloon

Y'know, just the other day Tusker showed up for breakfast wearing a t-shirt that said "Balloon Inspector." Then he "accidentally" put his hands on Rainbow Girl's chest. She hit his dingus with an enervating ray. The hapless dope still hasn't recovered from it. He's mopier than ever! I told him, "If you're going to waste so much time dwelling on your own impotence, why don't you at least do something useful with it and write some emo-rock music?" Then I gave him an ocarina and sent him on his way.

Oh, and that guy up there in the clown suit, with the bad spray-on tan? He's not a (state) county (city) fair employee. That's just Hank. All the Smallvillians know him. Hank walks around town in that costume all day, every day! The local folks don't mind none. Y'see, Hank is a genny-wine war hero but when he came back home sumpin' weren't right in his head. But he's harmless. Mostly.