Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Regrets, He's Had a Few

im41goldenpincers

So... what size bra do you think Demitrius' forehead wears? Granted, the bra would have tantalizing cut-outs for his "golden pincers of pure power." ...GAH! Dang it, George Tuska, did you bother to read Young Gerry Conway's script at all? Uncredited colorist, you're also due for a savage knuckle-rapping. Get in line behind Young Conway and Tuska. Jim Mooney, because I like you so much, you get to watch! No, thank you. (...Storm Boy wants to know who I'm talking to. SILENCE, FOOL!!!)

And I have to ask... does Iron Man even need a villain at this point? Because he's already paralyzed by his own whining.

11 comments:

MaGnUs said...

Errors in comics? You know which way to send the culprits...

Chance said...

Marvel really ought to bring Demetrius back, if only to have today's hip, meta-aware villains talking to each other about how no one wants to work with him because he's a jerk, and also because his head-boobs totally gross them out.

Anonymous said...

I have to tell you, this book is a real eye-opener on the process of writing comics and who doesn't pay attention to whom. As you point out, this panel shows that somebody dropped the ball. I think we can deduce [cue pacing back and forth] that the penciller gets first crack at the story (the Mighty Marvel Method), and then is passed in parallel to both the scripter and colorist. Thus we get Golden Pincers of Pure Power(tm) that looks like they're more likely made of a cheap pewter.

Of course, Demetrius talks a good game, but we all know that Tony can't move because his batteries died again. I mean, it's been four or five panels of "action" already, including fixing his voice to not sound so drunk and lecherous--watch your lobe-globes, Demetrius, Tony Stark is on the prowl!

Oh. I hope I didn't just accidentally give away the ending. Like Tony says in that last tiny thought-balloon, "sorry...!"

Stephen Rader said...

Being a Kinsey 6, I'm not much of "boob man," but I can appreciate some triple D, size 38's when I see em.

However, maybe it's me but aren't Demitrius' "golden pincers of pure power"... ummm... "GREY pincers?"

I don't want to get on Big ol' Booby Man's bad side, but what about those is "gold?" Or is "grey" the new "gold?" :)

Gyuss Baaltar said...

I had a hat just like that when I was a kid. The boob cap was a huge hit at the beach.

Justin Garrett Blum said...

This issue is giving me a giant headache. My god--Marvel must have just been randomly recruiting kids off the street to write comics back in the 70s.

Marvel Editor: "Whatcha got, kid?"

Young Gerry Conway: "Wow! Hey, I've got this great idea for a bad guy with boobies on his head! Except the boobies also have metal pincers shooting out of them. It's like Doc Ock, except with boobies!"

Marvel Editor: "Somebody give this kid a writing job!"

Why couldn't I have been around back then? These days I'd have to have a few books published to even write a Sleepwalker back-up in an anthology title.

I'd like to go back in time and kick Gerry Conway in the balls.

Dave said...

Russ Meyers does M.O.D.O.K.

My God, someone should revive Demetrius. He'd be a perfect Nextwave villain.

Bill S. said...

I think somebody was just trying to see if they could get a pair of boobs into a comic and still get the Comic Code seal of approval.

(You know, if I were Demetrius, my first action would have been to kick Slasher's ass.)

Is it just me, or does it look like Iron Man is reaching into Slasher's bright red pocket? Where's the other side of his glove cuff?

Blockade Boy said...

MaGnUs: Right, right, over to Adam Barnett's "Comics Make No Sense" blog. Great idea!

Chance: Man, Bendis could write two whole comics with people just gabbing about Demitrius.

Anonymous: Heh. The batteries! I'd forgotten all about that ridiculous little plot point. Really, Iron Man might as well just have a big wind-up key on his back.

Stephen: Grey is the new gold! Don't you read Men's Vogue? (Or do you just look at the pictures?)

Gyuss: ...And now I can't un-see it.

Justin: If I ever get my paws on another Time Bubble we'll take a little "road trip" and do just that.

Dave: Haw! It's true! Demitrius is just waiting to ride in on the current surge of 70s nostalgia.

Bill S.: Oh, Slasher's ass would be kicked in short order, my friend!

Stephen Rader said...

Ummm... there's TEXT in MEN'S VOGUE?

Who knew...?

MaGnUs said...

BB: Uuuh... that's not exactly the blog I meant... :>