Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Nation's Capitol Unprepared For Latest Outbreak Of Bird Floozy

Swan Rant

'Cause she lives in Washington DC, y'see, and she's dressed like... well, hell YES, it was a long, convoluted set-up for a lame pun. So? You wanna fight about it?

I think we just found the Black Condor a girlfriend! Not that he's into that. But let's move on. In your time period, when sexless nerds want to gape at statuesque, lingerie-clad females with feathers on their backs, they just Google images from the Victoria's Secret "Angel" collection. In 1982, they had to read "Wonder Woman" #288. The gal with the loquacious brain and the vivacious everything else is the Pre-Crisis Silver Swan, or as I like to think of her, "the good one." Whereas the two Post-Crisis versions were, respectively, a victim of domestic abuse with zero personality, and a mindless assassin (with bad hair), this Silver Swan knew exactly what she wanted and how to get it. What she wanted was to stay beautiful forever. And to get it, all she had to do was fulfill her deal with the god Mars and kill Wonder Woman. Like Poison Ivy, she was irresistible to men, and like Killer Frost, she was a vicious man-hater. And she had a great costume. The paradox is that individually, none of the parts really work -- the Scarlet Witch-style headdress, the puffy sleeves with attached cape, the lacy collar -- but dad-blast it if it doesn't look swell all put together! Well played, Swan. Well played.


Phillip said...

Gee, what are the odds two people from D.C. would choose such similar costumes? Must be in the water.

P.S. No more comments until at least one of them shows up! Come on, BB!

Scipio said...

Ooo, she said "peerless plumage"; nice.

She gets to work with the Penguin!

Jeremy Rizza said...

Sorry your comments took so long to show up -- I hadn't checked my e-mail in a while, and I apparently misunderstood how the "moderate comments" feature in Blogger worked. So I've turned it back off. Or to put it another way, "Welcome, Spammers!"

Phillip said...

I'll bet the word verification will stymie the spammers pretty well.